“I Have an Apple Up My Ass”
What sorts of things do callers say, well many confess things they have either done in the past or are doing as we talk to them. There are fruit fuckers and vegetable fuckers out there. I’ve talked to ones with carrots, cucumbers, and even an apple up his ass. The carrot and the cucumber I can kind of understand in a bizarre way, but an apple? Really? What makes you wake up and say to yourself, today I’m going to stick an apple up my ass? No idea if it was a tiny little crabapple, or a big Macintosh. All I can think of, is don’t eat pies at his house…
Some have used bananas and eaten them afterwards. Sort of like hiding the evidence in the best way they can think of to do so. I heard of one woman that used to fuck herself with vegetables and then cut them up and serve them to family and friends at a barbecue picnic. I was horrified, thinking of her pussy juices all those poor unsuspecting souls were ingesting. I mean, if you want to do that and eat your own vegetables that have been up your pussy and ass, feel free to do so, gross as it is, but making others ingest it when they have no clue? Fuck, that is sick and disturbed. The movie “American Pie” I think drove the fruit fuckers into high gear, giving ones ideas they shouldn’t be putting into practice.
I’d like to know after that movie how many guys actually tried to fuck a pie, I’m betting it’s not a small number! Sliding their dicks into a hole cut into a watermelon or a cantaloupe or pumpkin. It happens. I guess it’s a cheap sex toy, disposable, biodegradable, just a little odd though. Fairly harmless though. So I dare you to go to the supermarket and buy a cucumber and a tube of lube, nothing else-and go up to the teller and see her expression and that of the fellow shoppers!
Tickle, Tickle!
So this guy calls up last night on the phone sex line and asks me how ticklish I am. I was a bit surprised by his question, but not a lot surprises me since I took this job, I must say! I said my feet were quite ticklish and he was apparently very glad for this fact and told me to remove any socks or pantyhose I was wearing so I had bare flesh. I did and he said to start lightly raking up and down the soles of my feet with the tips of my nails.
I started to laugh, which is just what he wanted and he said to do it harder, and I started to laugh a lot harder. He was getting very aroused as I was tickling myself this way and started to ask if others had done this to me. If a boyfriend had perhaps ever tied me up and started doing this to me to the point where I was crying and couldn’t take it anymore. He then even told me about foot stockades, which I’d never even heard of before he mentioned them. He told me how he liked to restrain girls and tickle them all over their bodies until they squirmed and begged for release. I could tell he was getting really turned on going on about this and his breathing was getting heavier as he was masturbating.
He told me to do it on the backs of my knees and see if that had any effect and boy, did it! I was giggling like a school girl. I felt so silly but he was having such a good time and it wasn’t bad, it was kind of funny actually! I must say, he came pretty hard after all the tickling I went through. He explained that a girl losing control like that was very arousing to him, and even more so when he was the one doing the tickling, since she had no control at all over where he was tickling her and he liked to find each individual girls spot where she was most driven wild. That it drove him crazy, and he often liked to rub the head of his cock all over the bottoms of their feet at his tickle device of choice, leaving them all sticky with his precum.
The Wife of a Cuckold
I love cock and can’t get enough of it. My tiny dicked hubby isn’t of much use to me other than to pay the bills and lick other guys cum out of my pussy. That he’s good at. He loves watching other guys fuck me. Their hardened cocks gliding in and out of my pink pussy lips while he sits nearby and watches them go at it with me as he strokes his undersized cock. He accepted shortly after we got married he was going to be a cuckold. He knows I like pussy on occasion as well. One of my gal pals is another one of the deprived wives on the block and we have had fun together a number of times. I’ve also fucked her husband a time or two as she watched and then joined in. I loved it when she went underneath me and licked my clit while her husband fucked me nice and hard.
She is very good at licking pussy, and after he fucked me she sucked on his cock and licked it clean of all my juices, then we went down on each other as he watched us. We got his cock hard again and watched as he stroked himself as we naughty girls went down on each other. Then after I was finished with the two of them, I went back home and my hubby licked my cunt clean of all that gooey cum that had been shot inside of me by my friends husband.
A horny wife always has to weigh the needs of her libido with the feelings of her husband, not wanting to hurt him, but making sure I get the satisfaction I need and require. A bit of a juggling act to be sure, but well worth it as far as I’m concerned. I’ll do my best to be discreet and not make a fool of my husband, but I do put myself first, a girl does have to have fun after all, doesn’t she?
I Fought The Law And The Law Won
I was driving to a friends party out of town, a long, lonely drive a few hours away on a boring stretch of highway. Flat as anything, as that part of the state can be and was so bored. The thought of a drive like this was awful alone. So I called up a guy I know, I know you’re not supposed to use a phone while driving, but I was the only car I could even see, it was hardly a hazard to anyone, not even me. There was nothing to concentrate on except a long strip of road as far as the eye could see. I was grateful to at least have someone to talk to during the journey there.
As conversations can tend to do, it got flirty and a bit hot and soon my friend on the phone was encouraging me to put my hand down my panties. Luckily I had a hands free phone attachment thing on the dashboard, so I thought, why not, what else have I got to do, so I started to play with my pussy. I was getting right into it and all of a sudden saw flashing lights in the rearview mirror. It was a squad car. I said I had to go to my friend on the phone and I pulled the car over. The officer asked why my car had been swerving all over the road and had I been drinking. I said no. He again asked why and I said I was embarrassed to say. He demanded an answer and I said I’d been masturbating. He got this shocked look and then a smirk on his face.
He said he’d avoid writing me a ticket if I gave him a blow job right then and there. I didn’t know what to say, I really couldn’t afford the ticket and I thought it was likely easier just to do it and not worry about it. So he whipped out his cock right then and there and I sucked him off right out of the drivers side window. He came in my mouth and I swallowed it and he said I could be on my way, but no more masturbating and driving at the same time! I got to my friends party a few minutes late, but boy what a drive.
Guilt Free Masturbation
Who exactly is having phone sex? A cross section of society, that’s who. Some people that are more religious and repressed will fall into having phone sex and other forms of online fun because it isn’t actual sex and they feel less guilty about having phone sex with someone online when there’s no actual penetration or body contact involved. For some it is the only type of intimate experience some have had with another person.
For many any type of masturbation is a riddled with guilt behavior to them they simply can’t stop doing, so ones that venture into phone sex are the real rebels. You are actually listening to another person masturbate and them hear you, it’s the next best thing to being there and actually fucking them. Even the most religious people get horny, no way around it. Phone sex may be as deep a connection as they can allow themselves to have with another person since to them unless you are married, sex is a sin.
People need to loosen up and understand being horny is no more shameful than being sleepy or thirsty, it’s just a drive, plain and simple and needs to be met, not fought, not prayed it will go away and is a wicked sin. Phone sex is a god way to enhance your masturbation if you’re not ready to take the real step towards sex just yet, for whatever reason. Calling a phone sex line can be a lot more satisfying than going on a real date, there’s no guarantee you will get lucky on a date, but a phone sex call is a sure thing!
