Phone Sex Quickies
Are you a “Minute Man”, or as we girls in the industry so succinctly call you, “A Two Pump Chump”, or a “1 Minute Wonder”? Ha ha…Tons of guys are sadly premature ejaculators, you can train yourself out of it, but most don’t seem to have the willpower or desire to change that. Many guys that call paid lines are just looking for a girl to finish them off basically, I can’t even count the number of guys that tell me, “Oh, I’ve been at this for 30-60 minutes already.”
Most girls and companies have a standard 10 minute minimum. I decided when I started this line that I would have a 5 minute one. Why? Because I’d be potentially losing out on all the minute men and two pump chumps! Yes, it’s annoying, but they do add up. Some of my best and longest term clients of over 5 years are always under 5 minutes, some are 2-3 minutes! A guy that is that length would never consider a 10 minute minimum service, he’d be paying for 1/3-1/2 the time he actually uses. I am happy to deal with the short callers. You might disappoint your real life lovers with your antics, but I am happy to do a 5 minute call with you.
Why not offer less than 5 minutes minimum? Well, it takes nearly that long to fill out the billing info into the screen for my payment processor, it doesn’t really make much sense to spend 5 minutes filling that out for a 2 minute caller. Believe me, you won’t find many places offering you less than 10 minutes. I think many guys grew up jerking off quickly to avoid being caught, and even though they are now adults and have no such concerns, the behavior stayed to hurry up and that’s just the way they remain to this day. So if you want a 5 minute quickie, by all means call!
Erotic Relaxation Phone Sex
What is erotic relaxation? Erotic relaxation is different things to different people. Most women offering this type of phone sex certainly do not have any sort of relaxation certification. And even if they do, most people are not aware you can get a certification over a weekend, so honestly it’s no great feather in your cap to claim you’re a certified mind control expert. You can get certified online after a few hours of watching videos and taking simple quizzes.
I find more and more clients inquiring about erotic relaxation phone sex though. Most just want to be in a state of utter relaxation, which can be achieved by speaking sloooowly and purposefully in a fairly monotone voice, it’s not difficult. I recall after just having been in this job a few months, years ago, when a client mentioned this to me when he called back and said I’d “put him in a trance” when last we spoke. I did? Really? Me? That hadn’t been my intention, but he’d loved it and was calling back for more. And so it began, I found several clients telling me I had this effect on them, this ultra relaxation and incredible orgasm.
Once I got into making audios, a few started writing relaxation scripts for me to record for them and they loved them. Everything from mind control stories, to erotic inductions, to financial dominations. So if listing to me talking about relaxing you and what I would do to your body from head to toe in an even more soothing voice than normal appeals to you, then do give me a call for some erotic relaxation today. A few men that fancy themselves good at relaxation have even called me and tried to do it to me, even though they were paying for the call, which I always found entertaining, as well as relaxing. So if you’d like to try and give me a taste of your talents, by all means, I will listen to you.
NOTE: As absurd as it is, I was told by my merchant provider that the word we all know I mean here in this post that begins with an H is NOT allowed to be on the website, along with a few other words that are popular. So I’ve substituted the word relaxation instead. So there goes my SEO advantage. I’m sure anyone with half a brain knows what word I’m meaning though.
Religious Blasphemy Phone Sex
Are you looking for religious blasphemy phone sex? Are you a deluded bible thumper who’s time has come to be ridiculed? Then you’ll like me, I’m pretty much of an atheist and would love to mock you and your ridiculous ways. I know the very religious wouldn’t be on a site like this…Or would they? Many religious nuts are very pervy, not a doubt about it. It’s always the “pillars of the community types” that seem to get embroiled in the scandals, right?
I well recall the falls from grace of everyone from Jimmy Swaggart to Jim Bakker, yup, I remember the “I have sinned” speech! I can say Jesus Fucking Christ as much as you want me to. One man that used to call was an English Vicar, and he used to get so hot when I’d swear and take the lord’s name in vain as he stroked his cock and told me what a horny sinner he was as I laughed at him, but he did love his religious blasphemy phone sex. Baby Jesus butt plugs anyone? Oh yes, they do exist, Google them, very sweet, the idea of sticking a silicone toy up your ass in the shape of a “holy son of God”.
Maybe you’re more the I’m gonna stick a crucifix up my ass sort? Religious blasphemy phone sex often appeals to ones who were raised in an overly religious environment and this got mixed up in their minds during their sexually formative years and they now get off on mixing religion and sex, pretty weird really, but then I find it odd people need an imaginary sky father to blame and look to for the answers, all quite odd to me. If you are looking for this kind of call though, I will have you cumming on your precious Bible in no time…
Lesbian Phone Sex
For ladies out there who may be curious, once in a while we phone sex operators do get lady callers. Not many and not often but I’ve certainly had them and I like them. They are usually longer callers than the guys and more polite to be honest. I have listened to several ladies get off either with their vibes or their fingers over the phone the last few years. Many that call are not lesbians, they have same sex curiosities they have usually never acted out in real life and they think phone sex might be a good place to start.
Lesbian phone sex can be an interesting thing for men too, how can a man indulge in lesbian phone sex? Well one of men’s top fantasies is a threesome with two girls, and they love, love, love to hear the naughty, graphic details about the girls and what they are using on each toy wise and what they are doing to each other as he watches. I can recall one lady caller and I used to talk about how we both used the shower massager to masturbate with in the shower as the water pounded our clits. She also called and we talked for quite a while before I realized her boyfriend, another client of mine, was listening in, after she came, he spoke up and we had a threeway conversation.
Some gals are into spanking, just like guys, and like to talk about me spanking them and punishing them for being such a bad girl. Talking to lady callers has always been a fun and different type of call for me, and I welcome lesbian callers or even just bi curious lady callers that like the idea of playing on the phone while a woman talks naughty to them. It can be a very interesting and different conversation than they are used to having. So come on ladies, what are you waiting for?!
Custom MP3 Erotic Recordings
A few weeks ago when I wrote the blog about paid sexting I have been surprised how many have found that and paid for that since, ones are interested in my services other than just phone sex, that is clear. Another service I offer is custom MP3 erotic audios. I do have a banner on here for my site Erotic Audio Recordings, but clients of my phone services also are having me do audios for them more and more I find. Some do not have the privacy for calls, but can slip on a pair of headphones on to listen to the audio as they masturbate.
I love making erotic audios and am fairly good at it if I do say so myself. My voice is well known online for all the audios I do. I have several clients that enjoy writing and that will send me stories they have written and then have me record them. My fee for custom erotic audios is $2 per finished min, much less than most girls charge. I do NOT write the material in the erotic audio for you. I simply do not have the time to do that, if I did you’d be looking at $10 per finished min, which some girls do indeed charge. I do paid writing for another of my businesses, and I know the work involved in writing, so that fee is certainly understandable if you are doing the writing of it as well. Some of my clients enjoy erotic relaxation recordings and are very talented at writing scripts for this and then very much enjoy me doing them.
As a rule, I usually speak at approx. 100-120 words per min, so if you were looking for me to do a custom erotic audio recording for you, an online character counter would give you a fairly accurate estimate of the length your piece would be in length of time. Many men enjoy listening to audios over and over again. Some clients have had me do ones as long as 90 minutes in length, others have had me do as few as a few sentences they will play on a loop over and over and over again until they cum. If you are a true audiophile and enjoy the spoken word and have a penchant for writing, I would be more than pleased to have your story brought to life with my voice for you to enjoy. So contact me about doing a custom erotic audio for you today!
